Yes...it's a picture of turtles sitting on a log. No...it's not quite a metaphor for what my days are currently like...but only if they were! I seem to be having a tough time at the ends of the week, starting with Thursday. I hit a bit of a slump and start to really miss the pace of BBBS. Crazy, huh? I get really moody and short tempered (such a joy to be around!), lack focus and am slightly agitated. Not at all very turtle-like (I think...).
I've been disciplining myself in several ways, because part of what this is all about is trying to hit the 'reset' button on my life. So, every day:
* I eat healthier and drink lots of water (Sylvia is feeling very proud right now :) No McDonalds or fast food for 14 days now, no candy for 8 days, no soda for 10 days, I made eggplant packets for dinner Tuesday nite (eggplant with tomato and mozzarella), am cutting carbs severely and working on the good vegies (ick!)
* I go for a one hour, fast paced walk in Prospect Park (http://www.prospectpark.org/), and have found a good route with lots of hills in it!
* I am sticking to my 3 no-tv days and even found myself not watching yesterday - on a tv day! Who got put up for eviction from the Big Brother household! Somebody tell me!
* I'm reading at least 3 hours a day (currently finishing Stephen King's Lisey's Story; next in line is Kevin Baker's Strivers Row - if you love historical fiction, this guy is great! It's his 3rd - Dreamland is about the Jewish experience in Coney Island and the Lower East Side tenements and Paradise Alley is about Irish immigrants and NYC's Civil War draft riots). Julie - I have your book list on hand, too!
* I am re-engaging with one person a week that I have lost touch with or, sadly, let go of in the last few years. I need to mend those relationships or let them go forever.
* Per Macks, advice, I'm trying for spontaneity and risk: I'm going to the PGA tour next Friday (they're playing up in Westchester) and I've signed up to take a 12 week course in comedy writing -can you imagine!
* And everyday I think about work. Why I'm stuck; what I want to do, not do: how I want it to be; how I want to just follow my destiny: how could BBBS be anyone's destiny?; what about the kids and child therapy?; why hasn't someone created a 'bliss' finder?; is this all just self-indulgent babble....
And, yes, to Sue...I'm looking into some testing, although Diane and I both agree that career testing is probably a bit too limiting. This is more ego dystonic than a vocational albatross...it's about giving my left-side of the brain space to dance. How do I do that in our BBBS environment. Cindy Mesko would say, "humor!" Sue Sandler would say "play!" And therein, I believe, lies the answer.
3 comments:
The comedy writing course sounds fabulous. It's really different... and will engage your playful, creative side. And working on your physical well-being is fabulous too. Getting out in the world and trying different things, people, idea on for size is a great way to see what feels right. For me, thinking about things isn't as important as doing different things and seeing what happens. What did some wise sage say, "Showing up is half the battle." (Maybe that so-called sage was Groucho Marx or Karl Marx.) I find if I analyze stuff to death I just get caught up in analysis paralysis-psychobabble and it doesn't really result in insight... unless I'm thinking out loud with someone who rattles my cage. But then at some point you gotta do stuff and take risks like saying what you really want to say or try a different skill... that's when change starts to happen. IMHO.
Hey Sandy -
I have a few comments/questions.....how is going to a PGA Tournament about spontenaity & risk? Am I missing something......will you be pulling a "Bob Barker" on the course and punching someone?
Also I would recommend instead of vocational guidance counseling....have the songs you've selected for your iPod analyzed. What do the songs tell you about yourself.....why did you pick them...how do they make you feel.....????
I also sense that this Monty Python influence is pretty strong in your life. You may want to start a "Twit of the Year" contest in your neighborhood while your taking your break.
And last but not least I strongly recommend spending as much time as you can each day OUTSIDE! I think we spend far too much time indoors and it is not good for us - so just take advantage of your time and go outside! The turtles have the right idea sitting on that log!
What's risky and spontanious about a golf tournament. Well...maybe I stretched the definition of spontanious :0 I've been saying I want to go to a PGA event for years (and finally moved it to my list of things to do before I turn 50), so I'm just doing it now! And this is the first time the PGA has done a Playoff, with this particular tournament being the first of four tourneys (they're heading to Boston nest, Sylvia!)
The risk is taking the train, catching the shuttle, not getting lost, finding my way back and getting the laundry done so Lynne and i can go spend a week up on Cape Cod next week!
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