Faith on the Outside, ? on the Inside

I'm a pretty faithful-appearing person on the outside.  I wear the trappings of my Faith pretty well.

In my pocket, I carry around a little wooden rosary, blessed by the Holy Father himself!  I rub it and tangle it up in my fingers whenever I'm standing and waiting, or sitting in a meeting listening, or just thinking.  I have no idea how it works - no one ever taught me.  I suppose I could find a YouTube video.  For now, it's kinda like a rabbits foot.  I'm not sure it's working real well....

I have a beautiful print of the church where I was confirmed and received first communion.  It's right above my desk at work, where I could, if I were so inclined, gaze upon it and remind myself of my Faith.  I tend to do that only when I'm exhausted and defeated and wondering what life is all about....

I volunteer at church.  Or did.  The minute my commitment ended I begged off, with mutterings of being tired and needing a break.  All the while promising to help with this and with that other thing.  I love saying I do stuff at the church.  Now to make the time to do it....

And I do pray.  When I'm feeling worn down, lost, seeking direction.  Occasionally I'll do my best St. Francis impression and actually thank God for a beautiful day or the fresh air or the time to walk and sing tunes in my head..  Occasionally....

I guess I'm just an every day kinda person when it comes to Faith.  I play at it well.  I go through lots of the motions.  But inside...?